A somewhat weekly roundup of all the Brazilian news that may or may not actually be news.
- Culture: I’m starting a weekly roundup column on a Tuesday, following Brazilian logic guidelines.
- Politics: The cast of “Dilma’s Impeachment Vote” set to make late show appearances later in the week.
- Economy: My budget is tighter, as the memory of when I could get wasted on beer for under 50 Reais is driving me to drink more.
- Economy: Mayor Fernando Haddad of São Paulo declares that car manufacturers are facing troubling times only because bicycles have become the preferred mode of transportation.
- Culture: Famed television show host, Silvio Santos, beats impeachment hearing in the ratings. Proving that family dramas are no longer the preferred television format.
- Science: Brazilian Bio-medic, Deborah Zanforlin, creates chip which can detect 18 types of cancer in 15 minutes. In response, public hospitals promise to trim waiting time for treatment from 8 months to only 6 months.
- Politics: Congressman Jair Bolsonaro praises militant who tortured President Dilma Rousseff. President Dilma becomes both incensed and emotional as she cries on Castro’s shoulders.
- Weather: No rain in São Paulo in the last weeks worries those who believe Governor Geraldo Alckmin was telling the truth when he lied about doing something to prevent another water shortage.
- Politics: Angered by the lack of support during impeachment hearings, President Dilma punishes Brazilians by raising utilities prices as well as making huge cuts to health and education.
- Personal: The longer I stay in Brazil the more I fear I will die in a suicide shower.
- Culture: After following Brazilian politics, House of Cards writing staff decides to add aliens to next season’s storyline in order to maintain some form of fictitious credibility on their show.
- Culture: Given Brazil’s current political and economic climate, The International Olympic Committee decide to change date of Rio’s Summer Olympics to a more favorable time – Summer 2007.
- Crime: Greenpeace praises criminals who are robbing more on foot than in vehicles. Criminals complain that they can’t afford the gas money anymore, but accept the praise and take their wallets.
- Politics: ISIS decides against attacking Brazil for fear they will be upstaged.
- Politics: House Speaker, Eduardo Cunha, comes to mild realization that he isn’t as loved by the right as he believed he was. Seen crying in the bathroom.
- Personal: Following Brazilian guidelines there is no guarantee that there will be a punctual weekly round up of non-news for next week.
Have a great holiday.
Follow me on Facebook at The Bridge Point by clicking here.
Discover SESC Pompeia by clicking here.
Have you ever underestimated Brazilian hot sauce? Click here to find out my story.